Gert graduated from Early Childhood (formerly known as Early Hilechood) yesterday. It was a sweet, adorable and emotionally charged ceremony. The kids marched in, sang "I'm Bringing Home a Baby Bumblebee," played "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star" on bells they made out of plastic cups and sang "Zoom Gollah Gollah" which, despite my poor spelling, was one of their favorite songs.
Gert gets her certificate.
Gert enjoys the spoils of graduation. Cake, cookies and punch.
She can't go back. But she still has her memories.
No academic slouch herself, Matilda managed to win just about every academic award offered to 6th grade students. Here she sits with her haul, no doubt starting the first few lines of her future Nobel Prize address.
Two riding days left until I'm off the bike for 10 days (or more, depending on weather when I return). And it's raining today. In a really freaky way. A band of showers moving northward straight over us. Dry to the west, dry to the east.
Then storms this afternoon. Darn it. And I only have 30 miles until I reach my self-imposed goal that I set past the previous self-imposed goal that I passed on Sunday.
Sigh.
Double sigh.
I'm not sure this is healthy. I actually feen for riding. Yes, I could ride the trainer. But I want to ride, for real. I don't know why. But when I don't get to I get crabby.
I have to admit, I'm not a fan of dredging up problems that are so far in the past that they have no solution. Though that is hard to reconcile with my desire to know the truth.
That being said, I'm proud of the way Bjarne Riis finally handled his confession to using EPO. I'm, of course, saddened that he won the Tour in that manner. However, one cannot change the past and, let's face it, I think we all knew.
But Riis has the right point. If cycling's doping problem is going to be fixed, we can not continue to chase after the specters of the past. It does little good to work on the future. I do not doubt Riis' current commitment to clean sport.
Am I naive? Probably. But, ultimately, he's right. The future of cycling needs focus. Unfortunately, as Andy Ihnatko is fond of saying "A lot of people will have to die for this to change." Meaning, the old guard needs to be ushered out. The omerta and the code of silence needs to be broken.
I've said it before and I'll say it again. Doping is not a singular problem. It's not one athlete. It's a system and it's a culture. To fix this, you need to fix the whole thing. Tests and punishments obviously do not work. They have not worked for decades. Cheating will always exist, but removing the bullying code of silence that stops athletes from speaking out against unfair sport, is what damages this sport--every sport--the most.
I will write. Tell stories. Regale you with tales of derring-do. In fact, Gert and I busted a shoplifter last night. She's changed the story to bank robber, but media reports vary. Great story.
But, no time. We're going on vacation soon and, when you work for yourself, that means you have to work three times as hard to afford one day. Sucks. But, whatever.
Plus, school for the kids has been crazy. And wife's schedule has been crazy. And . . . on and on.
Where are we going? Disney World. All my aging hipster parent readers can chime in about how they are so socially responsible that they wouldn't dream of letting their children step foot into a Disney park and ruin their political training with princesses, fantasy and all of that bad shit.
My response? I like my kids. They want to go. So do I. I don't feel the need to place some sort of moral on a theme park. Is Disney a corporation? Yep. But so are all of my clients. Do my kids care? Not a bit. In fact, they shouldn't. They should worry about chocolate, cooties, bug guts and tutus. They shouldn't worry about multi-national corporations and their deceptive marketing schemes and . . . snore.
I live with my kids. Not through them.
So, while my daughters are running around in princess dresses having a good time pretending and living in a fantasy, you can scoff and call us names.
And mourn the childhood your child may never actually get to have.
Today marks the beginning of the Floyd Landis vs. USADA hearing at Pepperdine University.
I could pretend that I have something insightful to say, but things being what they are, I do not. I do know that the next two days you can expect some really harsh language from the USADA. They've sat by while Floyd has been able to go on the attack. Right or wrong, there are only so many gut punches they can take. Not only will they come out swinging, but they'll be kicking and spitting as well.
Since I have little to say I'll offer some useful links:
1. Trust But Verify's Hearing Coverage--If it's said, it's here. Good, bad, and ugly. TBV has a bona-fide judge by his side who has actual years of lawyerin' under his belt. The honorable Mr. Hue will be watching along with the rest of us. Only smarter.
2. I don't have a second link. So, here's the stage in dispute, just for fun. If that doesn't satisfy you, here's The Clash's London Calling. Reason? No one ever needs a reason for The Clash.
Finally, as I'm prone to do, I made a Floyd Landis Hearing Mix. It's in a handy flash player, so you don't have to do anything. It starts off with Herve Villechaize (yes, Tattoo from Fantasy Island) and ends with Wilco covering Bob Dylan/The Band (technically, the Band's version). Songs of defiance and law. Or something.
I have been trying to work Herve Villechaize into anything for a long time. Today my dreams have been realized. In fact, he now has his own label.
Have you ever seen three men who trust and respect one another so much? Wow. They look so confident in their alliance and their belief in one another. McQuaid (as portrayed by a pudgy Michael Caine, apparently) actually looks like he's concerned that Prudhomme's hand is poisoned and it looks as if Lefevere is ready to bolt the second a member of the Belgian press corp questions him about employing an admitted doper. I do hope Lefevere asked McQuaid if he thought the genetically imperfect Mafioso of southern Europe could be reeled in for this fight.
So, yes. These are the knuckleheads who are going to fix the doping problem in cycling. Because they've been doing a great job of it so far. You see, when something is not working what you do is this:
1. Get all the same people who have been involved for decades, from various levels, and make sure they continue doing what they do. New ideas are bad. 2. Get those people together and have them talk about how bad doping is and how those naughty athletes need to be punished. 3. Someone, at some point, should bring up the theoretical possibility of genetic doping. 4. Talk about how your doping program is working. No YOURS is great. No REALLY. 5. Blame it all on Floyd Landis and Jan Ullrich. After all, they started this whole damn thing. It's not like there was an event 9 years ago that we all should have learned from or something. 6. Do NOT ask Lefevere about his team results for 2007. 7. Do NOT bring up the doping system. Do not acknowledge that anyone else should be held responsible in a AAF other than the athlete. Certainly a DS would be in the dark. No team doctor or soigneur would be involved. Continue thinking that athletes act alone. Ignore the grassy knoll. Do not pass go. 8. All agree that doping is very bad and something needs to be done. This is important: Don't actually come up with new ideas. 9. Shake hands, pat each other on the back. 10. Lefevere and McQuaid team up and beat the crap out of Prudhomme in the parking lot.
UPDATE: I have footage of the meeting. It starts with Prudhomme drinking his first Guinness (courtesy of McQuaid). As you can see, they are getting along very well and even tried fielding their own team for the 2007 Tour!
