I Will Follow

Evidence will show that I'm copying David. I accept that evidence. Twas a good idea. Besides, he showed me the site and deserves to be copied.

Anyway, I added a link on the menu to my Last.FM profile page (because it's a cooler page than Audioscrobbler. This little page will show you everything I've listened to recently as well as who my top artists, albums and songs are. Scary. It's a pretty decent snapshot though. If you register, you'll also be able to hear music from other users that have similar tastes. I'd do a personal station, but it costs money. I don't have money to spend on a personal radio broadcast (my wife says).

Wait until she finds the small transmitter in our closet . . .

Kids Believe the Darndest Things

Actual conversation my wife and I had with Matilda.

Me: You know, tradition dictates that on the first New Year's Eve a dog spends with a family you have to shave him.

Wife: Yeah, we'll get out the shaving cream at midnight. They say that as his hair starts to grow back you will be able to see the future in his hair patches.

Matilda: Really?

I don't know what disturbs me more. The remote chance that she believed us or that she was actually excited about the concept of having a clean-shaven dog.

Life Would Be Better

If I could complain about things with Joe Strummer's voice. My voice just isn't suited to complaints, either justified or trivial.

For example, if my pizza was cold I could say, "Excuse me Mr. Waiter, my pizza is cold." In my Midwestern voice, it sounds . . . whiney. And Pizzaman would probably take care of my needs, but make fun of me behind my back.

But if I could say it with Joe Strummer's voice, he'd jump to help me. He'd go in back and say, "Dude, don't fuck with table 13. That guy is serious."

I know, it's a stupid wish, especially considering Joe's iconic stature. But he's dead. He's not using his voice for anything. It'd be a shame to let it go to waste.

See Asimo

See Asimo run. Run Asimo run!

See Asimo bust a move. "You've been served," says Asimo.

See Asimo take up drinking and lament his lonely, cold electrical world.

See Asimo take someone home in a drunken stupor and perform an oil change.

Asimo feels regret. Regret Asimo! Regret!

Disconnect the Dots

Brief update before the end of the year. I've created a quick playlist on Radio SFT to reflect some of my most played songs of the last year. Not all of them were released last year, but they all were major hits in my car and on Winamp.

So, listen now or forever hold your peace.

See you next year.

Happy Festivus

I'm mostly out of here for the rest of the year. Might do light posting, but for the most part I'm going to pretend to enjoy the holiday and not make snide comments about people who don't know I'm mocking them because they are so wrapped up in their own self-indulgent stories about how non-traditional their wedding will be because they are so cool and ultra-hip and the rest of the world should bow to their bland ideas of how we should all behave. Isn't it sweet?

Anyway, a new Radio SFT Playlist is up for Christmas. This music is actually serious, nice Christmas music.

Enjoy. I'll be back briefly next week to change things out. Otherwise, have a nice holiday, a good New Year's and a fantastic Wednesday.

Happiness Is . . .

Seeing your three-year-old daughter dancing around with her little plastic CD player (with microphone) to Beulah's "Gravity's Bringing us Down". When she went to Grandma's house this morning she brought along their album When Your Heartstrings Break (my favorite . . . and it was a copy. You think I'm nuts?) Beulah seems to be her favorite.

I mean, honestly, how cool is it to hear your kid sing, "Ba ba ba ba ba ba" correctly and not in reference to a sheep?

Very cool.

Happiness is also a warm puppy, I hear. And a warm gun. I'd be happy with a Boulevard Unfiltered Wheat. Droooooool. Beer.

Must . . . Have . . . This

Once again, Stereogum has ruined my life. How? By introducing me to a CD that is currently shipping from Amazon in FOUR TO SIX WEEKS. That bastard. Does he not understand the intense need he has created for a disc that seems to be hard to get?

What is it you ask? Why it's a French band doing Bossa covers of New Wave and Punk classics. My life will not be complete until this disc is in my hands.

How cool is it? Check out the covers of The Clash, Joy Division and The Cure.

Oh Nouvelle Vagues how I pine for thee.

Things My Father Told Me I Never Should Have Believed

That he was a sailor in the Bolivian Navy. (Bolivia is landlocked.)

That the knife he carried when we went hiking was to kill bears. (No bears in Missouri anymore.)

He played professional ice hockey but he couldn’t ice skate, so they let him use roller-skates. He was fired because the puck kept going between the wheels.

That I’d have to sit in the rafters for a hockey game.

That Vaughan Monroe sang with mashed potatoes in his mouth.

That the scar on his chest was from being bayoneted in the Korean War. (He got it while scaling a fence running away from trouble when he was a kid.)

That “Roof Tag” is a perfectly reasonable game for kids to play in the city of Chicago.

That liver/beer/coffee/beans will grow hair on my chest.

That playing tackle football without pads was unsafe, but my brothers sitting on me (most who played football) was perfectly reasonable.

I don’t know who tied me to a tree when I was three, but I should have complained about that more.

Naughty or Nice

A new Radio SFT Playlist for Christmas. Naughty or nice? You decide.

And honestly, unless you're stupid, it's pretty easy.

My Top Five of 2004

Everyone is posting a top something of 2004. I want to as well, but I can't settle on a list to save my life. My favorites change with my mood.

So, in lieu of a top ten best, I give you my top five albums/singles that (thankfully) didn't come out in 2004 because it would just be too painful.

5. Avril Lavigne - The Goldberg Variations
4. Marilyn Manson - I Killed the Pope, Slept With My Mom, Kicked a Puppy and STILL NO ONE CARES ANYMORE.
3. The Everly Brothers - Wake Up Little Suzie 2004 (Sorry 'Bout the Roofies) Extended CD Single
2. Kajagoogoo - Sing the Hits of Leo Sayer
1. Britney Spears - My Prerogative

Crap. Number one came true. Hit the bunker, it's only a matter of time!

Runners up: Clay Aiken - Growing a Beard and Dan Fogelberg - Can't Sit Down

Drink a Big Black Cow and Get Out of Here

You love Steely Dan and you know it. Between the bubbling guitar riffs of Larry Carlton (shot in the neck, so you don't have to be) and the mashed potato backing vocals of Michael McDonald (should have been shot in the neck) you can't get enough. "Hey Nineteen?" Brilliant. "Aja"? Wonderful. "Reeling in the Years"? Tired of it.

But, if you're like me, you never know what the hell Donald Fagan is babbling about. He pronounces the words just fine, but he can't seem to sing about things I actually know about. Bleeker Street? Never been there. Squonks? No clue. Muswellbrook? Totally off the charts. Steely Dan? Well, I read Naked Lunch. You'd think Walter Becker would at least explain Fagan.

Still, Steely Dan, despite the fact that their fine studio craft has been usurped by crappy classic rock stations, produced some fine music. I just don't know what it's about.

Fear not little ones! All you need is The Steely Dan Dictionary. It explains it all AND is a valid source for your term paper on the East St. Louis Toodle-oo.

And despite the fact that I never know what Fagan is singing about, I still love The Nightfly.

That's right. I like Steely Dan. So sue me. I like Neil Young and The Banana Splits too

Get Back Loretta!

Can you believe it? After more than two years of neglect, I actually added some of my mixes to the CD Projects page. As Joey used to say, "Woah Blossom".

Now, this is only a small selection of discs I've put together. I make roughly two mixes a week. Most of them suck, unless I have an intended audience. Right now I'm polishing four follow-ups to the trip mix I made in August. They are bound for Portland and Rhode Island.

Groovy.

So, go check out the updates.

Are You Sitting Down?

I'm updating the CD Projets page. Oooooh. Don't get over excited. I just cleaned in here.

Happy RamaHanuKwanzMas

Nothing much to say. I'm busy, one kid has the dual sickness of the stomach flu and Pink Eye. My wife is feeling under the weather, most likely exhaustion from mopping up vomit and daubing crust out of a child's eye. I try to help, but when you wake up with bodily fluids violently flying out of your eyes and mouth you tend to want your mommy. I don't take it personally. In fact, I'm thankful.

We did decorate the tree on Saturday. Mom didn't feel good, Matilda participated when she could (she's the puker) and would direct the action from the couch until her eustachian tube (I kid you not, the hits keep on coming in the O'Brien house) started acting up. Gertrude, on the other hand, was wonderfully excited about taking the ornaments off the tree and hiding them in her room to play with later. We've located about three, but for the most part our tree looks like the Griswolds' car after they visited East Saint Louis. I half expect to find our ornaments auctioned on eBay. I wouldn't doubt that this little three-year-old could type.

Anyway, I owe several people holiday CDs and I'm working on them between puking, larceny and moaning.

I've posted a new Radio SFT Playlist focusing on the stranger side of the holidays. My Jewish friends will note a few songs to close out Hanukkah with. The first one may be offensive to everyone. Nothing says "Happy Holidays" like mocking several religious groups, Princess Di and Billy Joel in one fell swoop.

All is Quiet

Yeah, I know, I'm not posting. I don't know if it's the time of year or if my life is just nuts but I haven't been able to find time to wax poetic about such important things as Elvis Costello and the best kind of cheese to pair with a good Pale Ale.

Besides, it's the holidays. You should be shopping for my present.

I promise to get back to actually writing things. You know, like Pam Anderson now that she's a novelist. Only I have smaller breasts.

Hey Santa Claus

Anyone who knows me knows that I'm just a jolly fricking Christmas elf. I love the colors, the pageantry, the whole idea of the Christmas spirit.

Actually, that's far from true. I'm usually irritated by the whole Christmas process. I hate the crowds shopping. I hate the annoying people who are chipper and so filled with the spirit you want to grab them by the ankles and slam them against a wall repeatedly.

But, I like giving presents. And I love how the whole season affects the kids. I love how excited they get, how anticipation just about kills them and I love the surprise of opening the gifts. But, my favorite part is the Christmas morning gluttony overload where the kids are sitting in the middle of the year's new toys with a glazed look that says, "Holy crap. I have no idea what to do first." Better yet is when they collapse under the tree and fall asleep.

All that being said, I also love offbeat Christmas music. And that is why I post today. Starting today and running through the end of the month I will post a new Radio SFT Playlist. Each week will have a new theme. This week's is Frat Rock. We will also have Naughty, Nice and Just Plain Damn Weird. There will also be a few Hanukkah songs thrown in, when I can find them. Tell your friends, of course.

So that's all. Enjoy the new playlist.

I must warn you that there may be adult language in some of the songs. I know, I'm making the Baby Jesus cry, but this is Rock and Roll man.

I will be sending out my annual Christmas on Mars discs to a select group of people. If you desperately need one, drop me a line. But you may get it after Christmas as I don't have much time this year to dedicate to making it and sending it out.

The Mouth of Sauron

It's about damn time.

Groovy.

If you're not a geek, don't even bother clicking. You'll roll your eyes and wonder what time the D&D game starts. To that I say:

Thhhhhhhbbbbbbbbbbbtttttttt.

Over Here

I've been called to task for not posting lately. So I'm posting to explain my not posting.

I'm busy. So is my wife, that's why she's not posting. It's pretty nuts around here.

That is all.

Thank you for your time.